Last week I went on a trip to Kentucky. The purpose of the trip was a memorial service for my grandmother Mary Ellen. She passed away four years ago and donated her body to the University of Kentucky Body Bequethal Program to be used in their school of medicine and dentistry. They were now finished with the clinical work and were having a service for her and several other people who had also donated their bodies.
Myself, CJ, Seth and Sean headed for Kentucky early Monday. It was a pretty fun drive over with CJ, Seth and I mostly making fun of Sean because he slept the whole way. That boy can sleep through anything. We would put the window down on his side, turn on the heated seat, violently turn the car from side to side at 80, etc and it still did not bother him. In three days and two nights he slept about 32 hours. I guess that was good because if he was awake he was bitching about something. Politics, conforming to society, his life, getting older and on and on. He got to be real annoying, real quick. A couple of times Seth wanted to kill him and I had the same feeling once or twice. He may not go on many more trips with us.
When we got to KY we went straight to Dad's house to see him and any other family members who might be present. When we pulled in I noticed that his yard looked like it had not been mown in several weeks. This makes no sense to me because he is retired and has gas and a riding mower! So five minutes after a long drive we are mowing and trimming my dad's yard. I love my dad but it is amazing to me that we are related. After we mowed the yard(and did some plumbing work) we settled in. My father had several family members in from out of town and they are an interesting bunch:
Dora. Dad's first cousin from Warrensburg who is so called because of her bad haircut.
Chester. Dora's husband who we are 99.9% sure is having relations with his daughter. Poor dressing, cowboy hat wearing and daughter boning are not good things! He and his daughter went on one or more errands alone per day and would be gone for a long, long time. I will say that for his age that boy can get it done.
Daddy's Girl. Chester's daughter. Wore revealing clothes that only revealed major hail damage and other things unsightly! She had on some shorts that were so short when she took a step her ass cheek would be exposed. Not pretty. Best of all when she was relaxing on the deck she picked a booger and ATE it!
We say they are sleeping together because he kept hitting her on the ass and saying how good she looked and they were touching each other too often. The long errands also sent up a flag. YUCK!
Summer. Husband to another of Dad's cousins that lives in Mississippi. Summer because some of his teeth are over here and some over there. He actually had one tooth that was round. Where do you get one of those? He also had an eye that did not seem to function properly. If you got caught with this dude an hour of your time would be gone forever. He actually told me he had not had a chance to chat with me much and he hoped to catch up later in the trip. I did not respond but later that day Seth abandoned me with him and I was in hell.
There are other characters that were there but I am running out of time. I also got to see Sean in his manties, be within three feet of five smokers smoking inside at once and play poker with a bunch of guys Dad knows. During the trip I laughed a lot, was utterly disgusted a lot and wondered how I ever turned out the way I did.
The return trip was not too bad and we made it home safe and sound. I will say the 300C with navigation and rear DVD we took was great on the road. Not bad gas mileage for so much horsepower and I got to watch two movies.
Three questions:
1. Who do you think will get married first; Emery, Skip or Jimmy?
2. Have you ever received a Sonic gift card from Jimmy?
3. Did you know on Wednesday CJ and I will have been together for ten years?
Bye for now,
Shane
p.s. In all seriousness the memorial was very nice. The university was very nice in showing their sincere appreciation for the donors. My grandmother was able to help many people after her death. Mary Ellen Nelson, Mimi to us, was as sweet, funny and loving person as you would ever want to meet. If the world was full of people like you we would be much better off. I love you and will never forget you.
